Through ways and means I found myself on this YouTube video:

And I was not massively enamoured by the whole affair. I quite like some of Screen Junkies Movie Fights. When Max Landis is on YouTube in general, the results are choice, especially if he’s pitching movie ideas. But this one irked me, least of all because the men who were debating didn’t have much connection with each other, their argumentative styles were too different, and the conversation lead nowhere, fast. I guess that’s the structure of Movie Fights, but it was a far cry from being entertaining and enjoyable at that point. And I think the main reason I wasn’t entertained, beyond all the guys in this video not coming across as particularly likeable or charismatic, was the tired old argument itself, redundant as the needless concepts of Continuity and Shared Universe. I’ll probably rant about those someday, but for now, here’s my beef with this particular brand of annoying nerd culture…

(Pre-rant warning: I am going to assume from here on out that you, the reader, will have a degree of familiarity with the DCU; the fact that everyone loves arguing about everything; and the fact that I’m trying to make an argument against this arguing is a self-aware hypocrisy… Yep, that about covers everything.)

So I see the Big Three Fight as a bit of a weird conversation, because what I love about the Justice League in general is that they all balance each other out in interesting and diverse ways, and could take each other on if necessary. Mutually-assured-destruction-type deal, but less, you know, evil. Then you have the fact that since they’re all fictional, it IS a popularity contest which is why the Batman/Superman fights where Batman wins are significantly more famous, much to the ire of all Superman fans. There is so much source material that we know any competent writer could work out a way for any of the three to win, and DC actually have, probably repeatedly. So ignoring that, and if you present it as nothing but a fight (with time to prepare etc) then it just doesn’t float. In my head, the whole “Yeah, but without mind-control because it would give the others an unfair advantage.” thing doesn’t work. Because then they aren’t those characters anymore; they’re people who look like them, and have their powers.

And at that point, you’re asking who has better powers (if you count Bruce’s intelligence and training and intuition as powers), and it’s about here that I say who the hell cares? There are no good stories about who has better powers, all the “Finally, we see X and Y fight!” stories are about who has better motives (not even always ‘better’, sometimes ‘more interesting’ will do). Because “Who has better powers?” is basically just Street Fighter. They’re all pretty much the same class but with different moves, right? I dunno, I don’t play Street Fighter. But if you want a nerd debate, I’d love to hear “Which director would do a better job with this franchise?”, or the legitimately wonderful “Get people who’re really good at pitching stories to pitch stories then debate who had the best”, but what the hell are we doing playing f***ing Street Fighter with words? That doesn’t sound like internet nerd cultu– oh wait.

(Featured image credit: Taken from IMDb.)